Sunday, December 6, 2009

I ran and ran...

Two parallels crossed paths this weekend, a friend of mine was running into or I should say away from the same form that has crossed her vision for the past 14 years, and as she is afraid of realizing what the answer will be she runs away from it, terrified she tucks the truth in a hidden corner in her heart.

As I walked in the snow/rain/mush late at night, I began to ponder what if anything I am running towards or from. I think my adopted city has allowed me to unleash years of not being able to run anywhere. I have retraced my steps in every neighborhood and borough a hundred times over and my eyes and feet keep looking for something different to appear. I look for it in faded signs, manuscripts and photos, yet I don't know what it is I'm searching for. Somethings have defined their shape or purpose over time, but others are still vague, shadows that pass over my vision at night, never revealing their true form. Maybe I'm suppose to stop to get a better look, but part of me is afraid that if I stopped running, I won't find what it is I'm meant to see.

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